themeletor: close-up of a cupcake in the grass against a blue sky (Default)
[personal profile] themeletor
Two ficlets for [livejournal.com profile] aradiria.

Disclaimer for the first: The boys aren't mine, and I know nothing about period dentistry so it could be complete crap.

Disclaimer for the second: The boys still aren't mine. This may or may not be in the AU 'verse that [livejournal.com profile] aradiria and I both have stuck in our heads (she started it!), but if the characterizations are all wrong then it's not. Anbesol is a registered trademark of Wyeth Consumer Healthcare.

Disclaimer for both: These are boys with boys, rated upwards of teen. Not your thing, then don't read. I'm sick of tiptoeing around my own LJ.


Kiss and Tell sucky title. They always are.
[livejournal.com profile] meletor_et_al


“Jamieeeee…”

What, Jack?”

Sparrow sprawled hopelessly in and over a tapestry chair at the center of James Norrington’s library with a tortured, puppyish hand to his face. James stood in the doorway. Jack whined pitifully, then said, “Y’ve got no books no dentistry.”

“No, Jack, I wouldn’t, as I’m not a dentist.” James sighed and shut the door behind him. “What’s the trouble?”

Jack fixed him with a somber expression. “I’m going to die.”

“That’s probably true for most of humanity, however.”

Jack groaned. “Thank you, Jamie; are you ever not horrendously practical? I mean that I’m going to die soon. Of this.”

“Of what? A toothache?”

“My head is going to explode,” Jack explained.

“Really…” James walked over to the chair and peered closely at Jack’s jaw. “We’ll just see what we’re dealing with, shall we?” He tapped at Jack’s chin. “Open up.” Jack did. “Where?”

Jack tried to say, “everywhere,” but it came out as, “Aeiiyaouueah,*” and James pressed their open mouths together.

His tongue slid forward and around, touching on each tooth in turn until he found one that made Jack jerk and James pull his tongue in just in time to save it from getting bitten off.

“Second bottom molar from the back, on the left,” he reported. “And I’d suggest getting it pulled, unless you want that to happen every time you kiss.”

Jack scowled, but agreed, and said he knew a man – same one who’d done the rest of his teeth – who’d take care of it. Later.

Then he pulled James onto his lap, and they didn’t bother with kissing.

*Determining and typing this sound got the Vowels Recording from our production of MFL irreparably stuck in my head. Ow.

*****


Better than Anbesol
[livejournal.com profile] meletor_et_al

“Jack, for God’s sake, get your head out of the freezer.”

“Bu’ i’ ‘el’ss.”

“I know you claim it helps, but so would Anbesol. It also wastes electricity and attempts to convert the kitchen to an igloo.”

James heard the freezer door click shut and Jack sauntered grudgingly over, scowlish pout drawn on his face as he sat across the table from James. “Fine,” he grumbled. “Suggestions?”

“I’ve said. Numb it here, then get it pulled or drilled.”

Jack’s face told all – exasperation, pain, annoyance, crabbiness, and abject terror. “I will not. And Anbesol numbs my tongue, not the tooth.” With everything else in his expression, Jack still managed a convincing leer.

James rolled his eyes. “Jack, with a tooth like that you wouldn’t want to be kissing anyway.”

Jack’s leer deepened. “Who said anything about kissing?”

“Given that a blow job would certainly be even worse,” James replied with an amused frown.

Jack should have grimaced at that, at least for the sake of appearances, but he didn’t. Jack had never cared much for ‘should-do’s, anyway. “I suppose you’re right,” he muttered, and added, “especially given your considerable endowments…”

“Jack?”

“Yes, dear?”

“Shut up.”

“Why.”

“Because. Actually, I’m surprised you can speak at all, based off of all the wailing you’ve been doing about that tooth of yours.”

“’Because’? Hmh.”

“You think I don’t know you well enough to know how to shut you up?”

Jack snickered. “What, are you going to slide under the table and suck me off?”

“You already have your pants open.”

“How—.”

“Zipper.”

“Oh. Oh, mm. I didn’t actually mean it – I was half - ah - half-joking. God!

James lifted his head and tried not to hit it on the tabletop-bottom. “Well this is the other half. And it takes your attention off that damned tooth, and was supposed to shut you up. So, shut the fuck up.”

Jack didn’t actually quiet down much, but the noises he made were inarticulate (except for when they were “yes!” and “more!” and “James!”) and in sincere agreement with James’ decision and use-of-tongue. And suction. And… ohgodteeth. Jack almost snapped his neck over the back of the chair when he came, clutching the edge of the table and bucking into James’ mouth and completely distracted from his pained tooth and the related worries. He sunk into the chair and, in a limp sort of semi-paralysis, watched James leave the kitchen.

He returned a few minutes later with a self-satisfied smirk across his face that had nothing to do with the flush of sex still crawling down from Jack’s cheeks. “Get yourself cleaned up and presentable; Timothy Andrews, D.D.S. will see you in an hour. And I’m driving.”


And that's me for the evening. Getting-in-touch information is added to my lj userinfo. I really want my laptop back.

Ever yours,
Mel

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-13 08:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aradiria.livejournal.com
squeeeee!!!! Jack shall suffer! Muwahaha.

as to the second one, yay! Very very very much the feel that I couldn't put into words off five hours of sleep. :-D Snark all over the place and the ending was perfect. My fav line: "Who said anything about kissing?"
"Given that a blow job would certainly be even worse,"

the dentist was good. got three teeth drilled into, three shots of novacaine. slept all day, and when I woke up it was better (I was also feeling really nautious before then, which is why I decided to go ahead and sleep). Just in case you were wondering. *hugs* Thanks so much for teh ficcies! :-D

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-13 11:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kira-k.livejournal.com
Aww~
I love [livejournal.com profile] fic_on_demand, and I love you. ^.^

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-14 02:09 am (UTC)
ext_7904: (Default)
From: [identity profile] porridgebird.livejournal.com
These are wonderful! Both of them! And I don't like modern-day AU! ok... I didn't think I liked it. Feeling much more open-minded now, oh yes :)

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-14 04:24 am (UTC)
melusina: (Default)
From: [personal profile] melusina
Hee! What a clever idea, to write the same situation close-to-canon and then as a modern AU. These work very well together. . .

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-14 04:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elessil.livejournal.com
Mwahahahaha! Poor Jack. At least he has James to take care of things.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-14 08:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] duckgirlie.livejournal.com
Hmm... Dentistry.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-06-14 09:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tiggothy.livejournal.com
*squeee* Love both of them :-)

Now I've got to run back & read up on your fics from the last few days (because I've been not-reading them because of trying to write my own fic & you being so good at writing makes me annoyed at myself... you know what I'm like)

*squeee* again :-)

(no subject)

Date: 2007-08-07 10:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pirate4evrnavy2.livejournal.com
I was looking back over my entries to friends lock found my old challenge from about a year ago to my toothache and decided to reread these that you reffered me to!

And are they cute! I loved them both!

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themeletor: close-up of a cupcake in the grass against a blue sky (Default)
i'm cooking the veggies and valuing myself!

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